The world changed?

Fine, I will post a link to the story tonight that inspired me to write this blog, though its more for the concept of the story, than the standard of it, but hey, others might see it differently…?

In a sense, I sorted of covered it in one of my stories that only went to ebook (way too many real names of the past), which if anyone wants to shock an old lady, is still available, so…

Its an interesting thought, at least more in the sense of my story, as to what you would do, if it happened to you? I open the door, walk out, and there I am, a young chorus girl, off to dance on a movie musical. I guess it depends how much you know things have changed? If you knew something was wrong, you’d probably freak out, but if the world changed, in a way where you were actually said chorus girl, would you really notice any difference?

I must admit, one of the things I’m looking forward to, in Blackpool this year, for the film festival, is the whole 30’s ‘glamour girl’ thing, in her promo outfit, or her dance one, given we’re doing Thats Entertainment. No, even without my back issues, I havent got Clara’s dancing skills, but it would be fun to follow in her footsteps, just once. I must admit, the whole movie actress thing would be fun, regardless, and something I could probably more cope with.

But no, nowadays, in this current world, I’m a 60 year old, (partially) disabled lady, with little dance skills, and a life to live. But if, tomorrow morning, when I opened the door…?

OK, video time. I might have my eyes twinkling at the thought of the world changing for me in that way, but its not going to happen, I’m sure. Alice White wasnt the most talented movie star of all time, by any stretch of the imagination. Her, and Toby Wing sort of got modest careers, with modest talent. I wonder what would have happened if Clara Johnson had got the same lucky break? Alice is actually dubbed here, her singing was, err, that good. Her dancing wasnt great either, but she looked very cute, so…

One way, or another, you’ll be a bunny girl!

I guess it depends on your opinion of the matter as to whether Hugh Hefner used the young women he put into Bunny Girl outfits, or whether they used him by using his fame to get their faces (and tails) noticed by people to help boost their fame. Which is correct, who knows? my opinion, six of one, half dozen of the other, but anyway… it worked out well for both!

Yes, the Bunny Girl outfit was sexy, was aimed at men, but it has to be noted, that unless you know otherwise, all the girls who wore it, wore it willingly! Mind, some of us might have enjoyed being mind controlled into becoming a sexy Bunny Girl, but thats beside the point, I doubt it happened! There might have been a few ‘convinced’ into wearing it, though I suspect most of that was friends, rather than Hefner himself. I have to say that one of my stories, ‘Of an innocence divine’ could be accused of turning girls into similar sex objects, but that was mind control, and that was fiction, so…

Oh, for those curious?

What people conveniently forget when condescending Hefner for the whole Bunny Girl, and Playboy Club thing for women, was that this was the 60’s, when liberation for women, both sexual, and in the job market was just starting to develop. Oh, and I suspect the pay was pretty good by the standard of those days too! So, good looking, confident young women, who wanted to get themselves noticed, by the right people, this was one of the better job outlets going! I’m not saying Hefner didnt get something out of it himself, as over the years, most of the playmates were younger, or much younger than himself (more recent times), and these girls probably thought they owed him something. So in those days of sexual liberation, and early birth control, I’m sure the inevitable happened!

Would I have become a Bunny Girl, given the chance? Who knows, a young actress, who maybe wasnt going to become a star, who could dress up sexily, and might ‘pull’ a rich man as a husband because of it, well, just maybe…? No, by the time I reached that age, the peak of its fame was gone, and besides, I was never that pretty anyway lol!

But let me say one thing. If someone offered me the chance to dress up, just once, as a Bunny Girl, I’d do it, and probably parade wearing it too, but that maybe the actress in me talking, who knows? Equally, all the same, if someone wants to ‘brainwash’ me into thinking I’m really a bunny girl, then go for it, though I would definitely want the outfit in that case.

So, RIP, Hugh Hefner, and thanks for all the memories of youth, and so much more.

The video, big clue in blog title. However this live, very raw version of the Blondie song is a bit different to the single version. For better, for worse, your call only.

The merging of personalities

When it comes to story writers on the EMCSA, there are a few that I seem to have a love/hate relationship with. No, not in a personal way, just the nature of their stories. There is one guy who either annoys me totally with his pieces, or I just love the stories, nothing in between. But fine, this isnt about him. This is about a female writer, who uses some most delicious methods to control people, but then has this bad habit of stepping outside my comfort zone over an issue like unnecessary humiliation usage. Her name is Heather, though it isnt the Fembotheather I’ve mentioned before, I might add.

One story of hers that intrigued me for various reasons, was this one.

No, I’ve never worked in the Worlds ‘Oldest Profession’, and nor would I want to, even if I was young enough, and pretty enough to do so. Though I guess, if needs must? Let me add that I’ve known personally a couple of ladies who have, a long time ago, and they told me that it wasnt as bad as the image might be portrayed. Fine, both of these women operated out of safe premises, not the street corners, but fine, I admired them for doing it, and thought, not for me though, thanks.
But this story is supposedly a step up on that, high class escort girls, and fine, the story did have me wondering what that type of work would actually be like? Fine, at 59, and not all that pretty, I’m not likely to find out now, but OK, it made me curious as to what it would actually be like, doing that role? Is it as glamorous as in the story? I know, not going to find an answer here, but anyway…

Her other story I read today that had me thinking, was this one.

No, I dont think again, at my age, and with my looks, I’m likely to find out what its like to be desirable and sexy, through an alter ego like Amber. But equally, I do wonder if my latent, and currently fairly dormant acting talents developed because of that bit part Hollywood actress in my past life? So yes, it had me thinking, if I just let go, and became Clara, would my acting skills, and presumably her dancing talents shine through in me?

I know, this piece is purely fictional, but knowing she’s within me, and even if she never made it as a major star, I’m pretty sure she was more talented in that field than me. So if it was possible to just let go, and really become Clara…hmm?

Oh fine, I’d rather become a big star like Jean Harlow, but even now, that little edge in talent, that might actually get me some decent roles, fascinating to consider? But yes, I cant deny that I’d love to become Clara, on my trip to Hollywood, if only to see the city as she would, allowing for the differences in time at least.

A saucy promo, one of my stories where you could say that Clara and I did become 1?
Go on, make us both happy, not a big price! Oh, and Jean appears twice too!

Video time. For becoming someone else, or merging personalities, one song instantly came to mind, this one

Respect yourself, Miss Harlow

I seem to be fast becoming the Diversity Queen of the DWP, which has to be a good thing, and I’m proud of anything I can do to help with this matter, for sure. I’m not quite in movie star mode for interviews, in that I still have to get to them by bus, definitely so sign of a chauffeured car at present, ah well…So no, not quite in the Harlow class just yet. Maybe the film studios are saving that for May, in Hollywood, but I very much doubt it! But a lady can dream, for at least 2 more months, so…?

On Tuesday, I was enhancing my Harlow look, with the semi perm make up top up session, though it didnt involve me being shrunk to a mere 5 ft 2 ins tall, or anything dramatic like that. Sadly, it didnt involve me becoming 20 something again either! But the eyebrows are now even more 30’s style (though with a saner width to them), and I have the Harlow rosebud look on my lips, so, playing Mama Jean at least, absolute piece of cake! So, if some studio wants to call, and discuss the part? Yes, I wish!

The intriguing thing about being a stats loving type, is that I do tend to look at the stats for my 2 blogs more than I probably need to. The main thing that interests me, is what blogs, other than the most recent ones, are attracting a lot of interest. As I’ve mentioned before, there are 4 regular candidates who appear a lot, but of late, in just the last few days, this one has rocketed back up the viewing charts!

Yes, the one I did when I was looking for assistance with the last story, that ECT one. No, I never got an offer, not even a placebo one. I mean, dont get me wrong, I wasnt seriously expecting anyone to offer me a full voltage session, but I thought that maybe, if nothing else, I might have got an offer of a look at a suite, and maybe experience a non voltage session, but no. But the last few days, someone, or a lot of someone’s in the US (yes, you get country location in your stats) have been looking intently at this blog. No, no one has actually offered yet, I might add.

I know what you’re saying, the books written, even sold a few copies, so I dont need to do the research any more? Maybe you’re right, but all the same, yes, if given the opportunity, to any degree, I’d definitely take it. Hey, I can edit the story if needed lol! 😛 Oh, that story, for those who wish to be reminded…

As if an actress would ever do anything like that? 😀

Right, video time. Resisting the temptation to avoid Bruce Willis quite easily lol. Something that all LGBT people, and indeed all people need to do! Folks, let me introduce most of you (I suspect) to the Staple Singers!

A Shocking New Story

Oh please, dont just pass on by, its not like I inflict lots of ads for my stuff on you. Besides which, doing it this way, you still get 2 more blogs this weekend, which wont be adverts for my new book!

Yes, I’ve been writing again, and this time, its something a little bit different. No light and fluffy here, though fine, the ending is pretty sweet, all the same. But just gets a bit grittier, and thought provoking along the way.

Oh, right, the link. is where you need to go. Yes, it is also up at Amazon, and will be up at Barnes And Noble, and a few other places soon, but at the moment, its just those two, and Kobo, so…Yes, fine, I’ll admit it, Smashwords pay far better commission than Amazon, which is why I’m featuring them. But if you love Amazon, just go there, search on Merry Brooks, and you’ll find it there too.

Yes, as mentioned, this isnt your sort of cute story that ‘Miss Brooks’ has written before, because it tackles a subject that interests, and intrigues me, but has the same effect on people as Marmite, seemingly you love it, or hate it, only in this case, it seems more fall into the latter. So, my positive look at ECT (Electro Convulsive Therapy) is going to annoy some folk, for sure! Hopefully some will agree with me though. As to the modern style of treatment, its very different to what you see in the movies! Best example I can come up with, is this one. I know, its in Dutch, but I cant do everything. Let me make a film in English, with me as the patient, and I’ll do it, willingly!

I know what you might be saying, she’s putting forward a positive case for it, but if she had to have it herself… Sorry, I would, happily, though fine, ideally, at first at least, I might prefer a lower voltage passing through my mind than a standard treatment, but if that was the only choice, then yes, I would, definitely! In fact, if anyone is offering…?

Anyway, the story, though you can read it in the synopsis on the link, a quick resume. Susan is a great believer in method acting, and likes to know how her roles would react to events. So when she is offered the chance to play a wealthy lady, whose children want her out of the way, in a psychiatric unit, while they blow her money, she needs to find out what that would be like, for real. And fine, because the children dont want her out too soon, they plan on getting her ‘treated’ in a way that will keep her there for a while. So, a stay is booked, though Susan plans to avoid the treatment, but…

Yes, its a role, yes, its fiction, and no actresses were harmed in the making of this story lol! Fine, I wouldnt mind being ‘harmed’ that way, but anyway…

So yes, if you want to make me happy, go give the book a try. Better, buy it, its only $2.99, and you have no idea how good it is to see your books sell a few copies. If not for you, go check out my other books, and maybe buy one of those instead?

OK, publicity moment over, which means its time for the video! Or tonight, two videos! Yes, same group, same song, so take your pick. Firstly, the original video

Then, a recent live performance, which proves that they can still do it live, about 40 years later!

Yes, you like the name of the group, which is why I used it? An amazing pair of brothers, it has to be said.

Thoughts turn to holidays again, at long last!

Funnily enough, this time last year, at time of writing, I was stood in the Immigration queue, at JFK Airport, wondering if I was going to make enough progress to actually get my flight on to Boston, to meet up with Kate. Yes, I did, and I did, and it was a great week. The funny thing was, about 10 days after I flew back from that, I flew out to the US again, this time for that glorious 4 week break in Hollywood.

Well, in the sense of planning holidays, this week marked a landmark date since then, I had to start planning for holidays in the future! Yes, my new work place, we’re allowed to request 2 weeks holiday for next year, that will take priority over other later requests. So yes, I had to think about dates for that.

The first bit was easy, contact Kate, see what she thought looked a good week, and suited her, assuming she still wanted to see me (she does!), and work out plans. So fine, thats one week in September sorted, almost certainly for Northern New England. Who knows, maybe I can get to New Hampshire, get regressed again, and get Clara Johnson to give up a lot more details about herself!

Therefore the other week I was looking for, was the spring week. Given that Easter is late next year (mid April), I decided to look at May, between our 2 bank holidays that month. So, where am I planning to go, you might ask? Or maybe you think you know, and could well be right! Yes, definitely west coast, and providing the baseball gods are on my side, it will be Hollywood, or LA at least. Why the bit about the baseball gods, you ask? Well, next years schedules get released next Tuesday, and lets face it, if the Dodgers are out of town for my whole trip, that would count against going there. But yes, one decent game, and I’m pretty sure I’ll be going to town. If not, I suspect a return to Seattle, or San Francisco would probably be on the cards, again subject to fixture list. Regardless, I suspect it will be a hotel, not an apartment, just not worth it for a week, or 10 days (if I can swing the extra days), though I might take a peek, all the same.

Sadly, I’ll have to return again, unless someone is crazy enough to fall in love with me, or decides I will make their perfect submissive/slave material. I know, stop laughing, I am kidding, I’m sure! Ideally, robot servant, organic, or cybernetic, but thats even less likely!

But yes, after a year or so, its nice to be in a position where I can actually think about holidays again, I must say.

The video? Well given its my first choice destination for my solo break, and its early Village People, lets go with this.

Oh, and a quick early plug for my new ebook, coming out soon. I have the edited version back, just need to work out the funding method to top up my credit card sufficiently to pay for the cover. I know, $7, but I have to put a minimum of £30 ($40) on the card to pay for it, and funds are complex until the end of this month. But I’ll work it somehow!

I have no idea how well an ECT related story will sell, but it will be interesting to find out. I suspect a few wont buy it because of that, but hopefully a few others will, for the same reason. As to research, sadly just online, and taking the practical issues from You Tube (most of those scenes in movies are just so wrong!), and taking it from there. Yes, I’d hoped for, and enquired to the local Health Service about at least a placebo session, but never got a reply, ah well… Yes, fine, I’d have enjoyed a low voltage session even more, but certainly wasnt expecting to be offered that, in truth.

A major milestone

Sometime late yesterday evening, UK time at least, this little blog hit what I would call a major milestone. I knew I was approaching 30,000 views earlier this week, and assumed I’d hit the landmark at some point this weekend, but then I got a bit of a rush of views, and hit it yesterday instead. Wow!

The funny thing is, this is actually my second blog that I started, but the other, my ‘real life’ self one, which actually started several months before, hasnt even reached 17,000 views yet! Its probably fair to say that this one gets more publicity, because its linked to several mind control forums, and because of what I write about, when people put in searches, for robots, brainwashing, and the like, then seemingly it comes up often in Google, judging by the most popular threads at least, and the related subject matter. Why do I think they’re linked to searches? Because they are about 4 or 5 years old! So no, you’re hardly like to just find them otherwise, lol!

I guess its fair to assume that the number of people who have found this blog, are far, far less than that. Thats because a lot of people look each time, when I advertise the new blogs on Facebook, Twitter, and the like. But even so, to me, and I know its been a few years, its still an amazing number.

Sadly, I know hardly any of my readers, as it seems the number of people who actually comment at all, are barely any at all. So who reads them, not really any idea, which I see as a shame. Seemingly, by a vast majority, the largest number are in the USA, whereas my personal one is dominated by the UK, where I live, most of the time.

But yes, to any of you who actually read this, thanks for doing so, and making it all worthwhile.

Oh fine, lets slip in a bit of pre-publicity, I’ve been writing a book this week, the last free time before I start my new, hopefully forever job on Monday. I know, there’s been a couple of false alarms along the way, but hopefully, this is it. Some might say the subject matter is a bit controversial, seeing its about ECT treatments, but hey, it makes a change to write something a little darker. It will be going to the editor this weekend, and then, when I finally get paid next Friday, hopefully I’ll be in a position to buy a cover, and get it posted up, and hopefully sell a few copies. I know, the money isnt much, but sales are always nice to see.

OK, video. You could say, this is what I am, by so many viewers

You’ve got the power

So fine, I thought I’d break the news, I’m writing again. Yes, new story time, for better, or worse, depending on how you feel about them! Talking of which I made a sale yesterday, on Amazon, of one of the old stories, made a nice change. Anyone wanting a link to them, comment with which ebook provider you’d prefer the link to, and I will reply back. Its not a fortune, but I still get some joy when it happens. Practically, I’ve got until Saturday evening to get it done, hopefully I make it.

The one difference this time, is that its not relatively light hearted fluff, set in the past. This is going to be a modern day setting, definitely with some grittiness, and a dark(ish) storyline, mixed in with the other stuff. Yes, inspired by my ECT videos, and dreams, mentioned a few blogs back, I’m bringing that into the story, as a main part of the plot.

Thats not to say that I cant write light hearted involving ECT, because I did. Lets just say that the result of that kind of ECT doesnt actually carry close resemblance to the real thing, as that involved intelligence enhancement, and mind control, so, yes, in my dreams! The longer story focuses more on what I would term genuine ECT treatment, and all the surrounding factors. Thats not to say that it wont have a relatively happy ending, because it probably will, but its going to get dark before it gets to that point.

Yes, fine, at this moment I am sort of planning on a bit of a feelgood ending, but I can never guarantee if I get there, or not, 30% of the way in! Of course, there is one scene I’m not looking forward to writing, because beyond this video

which I’m pretty sure is what I would call a placebo treatment (not real), I have no idea whats involved in a genuine modern day treatment, because lets face it, the movie ones are cranked up beyond reality, so not a lot of help. And fine, because the commentary in this is, I believe, Dutch, I have to go more by the images, than the words, anyway.

Yes, I would dearly love to do a placebo treatment myself, so I know what its like to experience it, or even better, a genuine treatment, though a lower voltage might be nicer than the full blast, but fine, I’d risk it, given the choice of that, or nothing! Fine, I might well enjoy it, anyway! I did consider writing to the 2 local units doing ECT, and seeing if they would let me do at least a placebo treatment, ideally more, but given that it really needs to be written before I go back to work again, next week, I’ve passed for now. But yes, I would love to do that, at least, sometime in the future. Ideally a small shock would be nicer, but…if anyone from the Yorkshire NHS units should read this, feel free to contact me at , and let me know whats possible.

At this moment in time, I’m assuming its going to go to ebook, and I then have to decide whether to release under the same name, or use a different nom de plume, given the very different nature of the story, which seemingly you can do, on the one account. Dont worry, for those who care, it will be advertised on here, when it happens! Who knows, something like this might just prove to be my writing breakthrough? I know, stop laughing now!

Right, the music video. A bit naughty, given the subject matter, but hey, ECT messes with the brain, so…

Anyone got a space craft going cheap?

Going back to events at the end of the last blog, as you can now gather, I woke up on Wednesday morning, and all seems fine with me. Actually, a couple of amazing things happened on Wednesday, much to my surprise. One of which leads to the witty comment in the blog title!

Firstly, for the first time in quite literally months, I made a book sale. Yes, fine, only 1, but given I havent put anything new up in a year, maybe thats to be expected? How do I know it was a year, simple! That morning on the anniversary thing that Facebook do, I got the notice that 1 year before, I’d put my last book up for sale, and done the publicity for it. No, it wasnt that book that got a sale, but hey, it was nice to get one, all the same.

For anyone wanting to add to my book sales delights this week, you can try this link They are also available at all good ebook stores, under the same author name, as you prefer.

But no, the commission on that isnt what will enable me to buy a space craft, or much else, given the cheap prices of the books (hint hint), and the fact it will be at least a couple of months before I see the money, anyway.

A while back, one of the hotel groups that I hold a membership card for, sent me a survey to do. I filled it out, and would have done so regardless, but for my effort, I’d be put in a draw for some Amazon gift cards. I know, me win anything, normally, but…there it was, the email telling me I’d got one, and the code to activate it at Amazon. Fine, its only £10, but hey, its better than I normally do! No, I’m not seriously expecting to get a space craft at any price, let alone £10, but no harm in asking! I suspect it will either be used on an item of clothing, or on an edible delight, but I havent investigated that yet. But as I say, if a friendly alien should see this, have an old craft up for sale cheap, then let me know, I’ll make him a deal!

These 2 amazing happenings actually tempted me to try my luck with lottery tickets this week, though the Euro Millions one last night, brought the usual result, no joy whatsoever. I’m not really expecting anything different with the UK one tonight, but hey, I can dream, for a few more hours at least! Put it this way, if I were to win even one of the twenty thousand pound prizes, I would quickly be planning a trip to LA. A million (or more) would only make it a longer stay lol!

The video. I guess you could say I had one of these Wednesday, though that might be stretching facts somewhat!

And words are all I have

Some of you who are up with these modern, trendy things (Yes, I’m doing my best 30’s girl impression here!) may have heard of something called Patreon. Less than world famous writers, and musicians use it as a method to support their career, by having patrons donate money on a regular basis, so they dont have to worry about earning it in other ways. Hey, one of my favourite groups, Post Modern Jukebox (now quite famous) started off down this route.

No, dont worry, I’m not going to request money to support my story writing, despite what some tell me, I’m really not in that league, and I know it! And believe me, my singing is as good as Jean Harlow’s, and thats not a good thing! And lastly, unlike CJ, I have no plans to break into the movies either at present.

But one thing I do lots of, as some will know, is story reviewing. Now me, I cant see why anyone would be prepared to pay me to produce story reviews, but it seems, there might be some. And yes, a few extra pennies would be handy, I must admit. My primary area would remain the EMCSA, but I have realised that ebook writers, looking for reviews to post on Amazon, and the like, might be prepared to pay small amounts to get a guaranteed story review?

To show how little I know about the concept, I was asked tonight how much a review would cost, for a book on Amazon, and I hadnt got a clue! Has anyone got any idea on this? I guess it depends on how many words you have to read (fee, per 1,000 words?), but I wouldnt have a clue as to how much.

Yes, I’m not sure how much this could possibly raise, anyway, but I guess that unless I add a lot of extra words to my reading week, anything is a bonus? Though in truth, unless I can raise a reasonable amount (though I have no idea just how much?), I’m not sure how much of a benefit it really would be? I suppose book publishing companies need readers, to decide how good stories are, but breaking into that field, at my age, and with only having online experience?

Anyone able to offer advice, either through here, or to my email, at would be appreciated.

Right, the video, a double delight, of the same song. Firstly, the famous group version,

Secondly, an ‘old friend’, Gary Simmons, and his Bee Gees tribute group, Jive Talkin’. I do wish he would make more solo videos, or even better, with Kirsty Marr, but anyway…