Whatever happened to, that British actress?

So fine, as I move towards my 59th Birthday tomorrow, I’m feeling philosophical, so just bear with me. I will warn you now, what I will be like this time next year, when I hit the big 6-0, you probably dont want to think about!

So lets turn back time, and think about what might have happened, in an alternate universe. Right, so when I reached 16, I didnt have to leave school, and go out to work, because I had 2 parents living at home, and their ‘dear daughter’ could have stayed on at school, taken her A Levels, carried on acting at school, and then gone on to university (college to my US readers), and taken life from there. Or just maybe, instead of a university, I went to Drama School, on a serious basis.

The obvious outcome from there would have been a modest career, either doing small parts in a large venue, or decent parts in a small venue, until the ‘right person’ came along, and I settled down, got married, parts dried up, family came along, and all that, and it might still have been it. Boring office job, parenthood, or whatever.

Equally, given the reception to my early acting stuff was fair, it might have been better than that, large parts in large venues, a break in the movies, or whatever? If that was the case, would I now be living in LA on a more permanent basis than looking forward to a 10 day apartment break in said city? Now I’m not going to claim I would have been the ‘next’ Jean Harlow, or anything like that, but it might have happened. More likely I’d have been the next Clara Johnson, getting by on lots of ‘low in the credits’ acting roles, and doing other forms of acting, like photo shoots, playing characters at various ‘Conventions’ and the like? But yes, recognized as an actress, at least, which would have been fun.

Instead of which, I had to go out to work, to bring money into a home with a single mother, and though I tried to keep up the acting, it wasnt anything I could do seriously, while holding down another job, commuting to London, or whatever. Didnt stop me keeping up the battle of trying to be an actress (to some degree) until around the turn of the century, when the battle of acting roles, lost out to the job market, and I settled for a more ordinary life, on the whole.

But fine, doesnt stop me now, looking back and just wondering, if at 18, I’d headed off to drama school, where I might be now. Superstar? Bit part actress? Theater travelling actress? Or just someone looking back at her life, and wondering where her acting career got to? One thing is sure, unless we find a way to turn back time, and take that other choice, I will now never know! Still, 9 weeks today, I head to Hollywood, and in my dreams, someone might see me, see the potential actress again, and then…I know, almost certainly not!

The video is also showing my age, as its one of the punk classics. The Stranglers were renowned for not taking themselves too seriously, and this performance sort of proves it!

An interesting dream?

So fine, as I suspect most of my readers know, given the title of the blog, I quite fancy the idea of being turned into a robot. Yes, I know, 95% of my readers think its weird, but I’m assuming those who come here from various mind control sites, might think it less so, or maybe not? So yes, from time to time, I’ve posted up a few films of people having their minds zapped, or controlled in various ways, or equally, when it might be about to happen. Of course, in the movies, no one is actually having their minds zapped with large amounts of electricity, it just looks like they are. Or equally, having their minds controlled in various ways, again, entirely for show, not the real thing.

I know, I’d enjoy the real thing, but anyway…enough said! For now at least.

So fine, last night, I was dabbling around You Tube, and came across this (Neither video should be watched unless you’re prepared to see ECT in action, even if one is fake, as its from a movie)

Yes, that was real! Its from the 1940’s, when ECT was in its infancy, and was seen as a potential cure for so many mental issues. I know, some might find it hard to believe now, but its true! In fact, its still used today, but far less so, and nowadays people are ‘knocked out’ before treatment, instead of by the treatment, as in here. Anyway, fine, I enjoyed watching it, and would have enjoyed being in his place, but I thought that was the end of that.

But anyway, my dreams last night thought otherwise. Sometime, about an hour or so before I would be planning to wake up, and get up, in my dreams, I found myself in his place. OK, fine, I enjoyed it all, way too much, clearly! I woke up, after the ‘treatment’, presumably at the end of the recovery period, err, aroused, and excited, to put it mildly! Though I noticed no effect on my mind (cant have everything!), my leg was still convulsing slightly, just as if I’d really been shocked, but…oh, I wish I had been!

Well, they say dreams sometimes come true, thats one I’d love for that to happen! And fine, the having it while conscious route, is my preferred one too! Hopefully I can get my second session tonight! And if it can last a bit longer, just like this one (which is a movie, and presumably faked), yes please!

I know, I know, its probably one thing that is better in theory, than practice, but yes, I’d still love for it to happen, and have my brain properly zapped! So, if anyone would do it, pretty please…

The video, a strange little thing I found

Weird dreams are made of this

This morning, something weird happened in my dreams, even stranger because of the date, but more on that shortly.

I got up about 6 this morning, to go to the bathroom. Sadly, as is often the case with us older folk, our bladders cant always go the full night any more. Seems to be happening to me more of late, but hey, I’m getting older, so…

But after that, I went back to bed, to grab a couple more hours sleep, before getting up. Thats when the funny stuff started to happen. It didnt take me long to drop off back to sleep, indeed, judging by the state of my bed, I slept more peacefully than normal. Yes, normally I must move a lot, as the duvet, sheets, and pillows arent always where I left them when I go to bed, I seem to shuffle, and turn a lot!

But yes, this morning sleep returned quickly, and very peacefully. The next thing I know, I can hear voices in my room. Now, believe me, no one could get into my bedroom quietly, there is quite a circular stopper thing on the door, you dont open it quietly. So why can I hear voices?

After some time, I hear a voice say, “I’m sorry, but she’s just about to die.”, and react accordingly, I try to wake up! I do, easily, and look around, no one to be seen anywhere! Well, there is a cat meowing at the door for her breakfast, the moment she’s seen me moving, but other than that…nothing! And no, before you ask, I couldnt hear a TV on anywhere around either.

You see, the weird thing is the date. Yes, 79 years ago today, in a Los Angeles hospital, Jean Harlow’s family were told she was about to die, and of course, she did. Was it sheer coincidence, or was I, in my dreams, briefly whisked back to her body, for a couple of hours, and I was her? Sounds crazy, I know, but given my connection to her, and the date…? What also concerns me, is if I’d subconsciously accepted what I’d heard, would I have actually died? Even now, when I go back to sleep again, will I…?

So fine, if I dont reappear, please come visit me at Glendale, OK? I think you might know where to find me lol!

Video time. Well, it had to be something dream related, I guess?

Brainwashing helmets

Yes, I had a weird dream last night, or should I say this morning, given it was after I first woke up, about 6, and then went back to sleep again. The thing is, it was playing to my perversions. Well, the robot/brainwashing ones at least, though I guess the helmet could have transformed my mind into that of a twenties flapper, but I doubt that was the plan lol!

Dont ask me how I got there, I woke up (in the dream) laid out on a bed, with a helmet/cap (skintight, I should think) over my head. Basically I was told that this device was capable of disrupting brain thought processes, making me incapable of thinking for myself. It could then implant thoughts into my mind, and I would think they were my own. No, he didnt actually say he was turning me into a robot, but suspect the control levels would have been that level of intensity anyway.

Now, lets face it, at this point in time, most would scream, and try to escape, but I didnt. Has to be said, the look on his face suggested I”d confused him by that reaction as well. I didnt actually tell him to get on with it, but…you get my drift.

Annoying thing was, just as he was switching everything on, and was about to start the process, I woke up, aargh! And though I rolled over, and went back to sleep, I couldnt get into that dream, or indeed real sleep again. That might have been down to my arousal levels increasing dramatically, a very rare thing nowadays, but anyway…

Where that dream came from, no idea? I havent really thought along that route much in quite a while now. And as far as I know, devices capable of blocking human thought processes dont actually exist. Well, alright, I know some say that ECT would have much the same effect, but thats for moments, not a long term thing, as he seemed to be suggesting this helmet/cap thing would do to me. What I couldnt understand was why he was doing it to me, not some pretty young girl, but anyway…

Only shame was that I woke up before the process began! I know, it wouldnt have been for real, but…would have been interesting to know what it felt like at least. For someone with a robot fetish as big as mine, you’d think this might be a regular occurence in my dreams, but you’d be wrong, this was just the second time I’ve had a dream like this. Many, many years ago now, I had a dream where I was about to be turned into a robot, the electricity had just begun pulsing through me, and the alarm clock went off! Now that was annoying lol!

Its not something I deny, that I’d love one day to play out a really intense robotisation, or brainwashing scene, but I guess as I get older, its less and less likely to happen. Mind, I could jokingly say that my back, and knees are heading towards the perfect amount of stiffness for a robot anyway! I’ve had one or two vague promises to do the idea (one mentioned on this blog a while back), but they came to nothing in the end. I still hope that one day it might, but beginning to doubt it now.

Ah, the video clip. I have no idea what film this is from, who the actors are, or anything, but suspect its pretty dated, its black and white after all. Sadly the sound only kicks in halfway through the clip, so I have no idea what he is saying to her. And to a certain degree, it ends just when it gets interesting. The brainwashing helmet looks basic, but still, I wouldnt mind giving it a try. I suspect something far more exciting could be designed anyway.

Any mad scientists out there want to give the idea a try? They wouldnt need to look far for a ‘victim’ thats for sure!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifO5fNwCnxM