Wouldnt it be good?

Wouldn’t it be good to be in your shoes
Even if it was for just one day

Well, that is a massive hint to tonights video at least, though the blog, in truth, only relates to the first few words of that. But looking at that quote, I’d truly love to spend just one day in the shoes, and body, of Clara Elaine Johnson, and find out what life was like as a dancer in the 1930’s, all the same.

But no, this blog isnt about that, though I might come back to that at some point in the future, who knows? No, tonight’s subject is corsets!

One issue I personally have with corset ownership, is that its not an item I can get myself into, without assistance. Even before the back issue (more shortly), the arthritis in my fingers would make tying a corset behind my back, nigh on impossible, or in truth, just impossible. And being a single woman (no one is crazy enough to want me lol), I have no one else to tie me into one, either. Great shame, because I’d love to be tied into this, for certain.

Yes, supposedly a corset, though hard to tell from that angle. But yes, metallic silver, and all that…

Wouldnt it be good (see I knew I could fit the song title in here) if you could put on a corset, push a button on it, or turn a device so that it could tighten around you, without all that tying issue, which I cant do? I’m only amazed with all this modern technology that no one has ever designed one, ah well… Or maybe they have, but at such a silly price? Though in truth, I suspect for many (with partners, or supple hands), the tying up is part of the, err, fun.

What I found today, while looking for a back brace, to support me through the wedding, as standing still unsupported is going to be an issue for a while, was this

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/291246878042

Now in truth, I have no idea how much actual waist reduction this will do, as I cant see zips being able to pull in that tightly, simply because zips tend to just ease open, if you pull them too tightly? But yes, fine, my main aim with this is the back support, and I just see the corset side of it as an added bonus. Lets face it, my face would put potential admirers off, even if I had the perfect hourglass figure! But yes, at that price, I’ve bought one, to see how it goes. I have also bought a more straightforward back brace, which has magnets in it, which are supposedly good for you, but we will see. Thats just one of those velcro fitting things, but that should be fine, fingers crossed.

Yes, we will see…

Right, video time. Yes, you must have worked out the song by now, but this version gives you not just one 80’s legend, but two!

Advertisements

Tie me up?

Strictly, this post is a tongue in cheek piece of wishful whimsy, but if anyone wants to provide in the next 4 weeks or so, lol?

Firstly, on a more serious moment, I have arranged wheelchair assistance for the airports on my trip now. Even before todays news (more shortly), I wasnt going to be able to stand long enough for the Immigration queue, and maybe the security queues, so I got it done. Yes, I’m old, and beaten up, and I know it! 😛

Well, for a while, I thought, just maybe, but no. Yesterday, when I got home from work, I found a letter from the NHS requesting me to make a call, and make an appointment for my examination on my back, and the density of my bones. Yes! Maybe I can get something sorted before my holiday? Well…

I rang this morning, and the first date they could offer me, was 8th September, the day before I leave for US. I mean, I wasnt expecting anything immediate, but nearly 5 weeks…? Eek! So now, if I want to be able to stand, and serve as a bridesmaid at the wedding (and I really do, will be a first), I need a way to be able to stand for more than 2-3 minutes!

If anyone knows anything better (cybernetic spine would be handy, yes, tongue in cheek, I assume?) than a back brace, or corset, let me know. No, I havent got the money to go privately, not even close! Reckon it would be 5 days max if I could! In fact, someone has already suggested a back brace that will do the job, but…

I know, I’m a robot wannabee, so…anyone know of anything in metallic silver lol? Back brace would be fine, as that would solve issue, but a corset that could make me think it would turn me into a robot, once tied into it lol…? No, I’m not really looking for waist reduction, just back support, before you ask.

I know, cant be done, certainly not in 4 weeks, but thought it would be fun just to ask? But, if anyone can…? 😉

Video time. Found this purely by chance, and yes its adult, so if you’re too young, and reading this, go away now, if not sooner! But if someone wants to tie me up into a metallic silver corset, for September…?

Young at heart?

Well, regardless of whether I am, or not, I’m not young in body. I’m 57, for heavens sake, more than twice the age poor Jean Harlow ever reached in this life. But thats not the point of this brief blog, its the amusing job interview I had today.

If I heard the line ‘Its a young office’ at my interview today, I heard it a dozen times, or more. Maybe it was, and judging by the glance I cast round the office post interview, seemingly it is, as I couldnt see anyone much the other side of 30, but as far as I know, strictly, age cant be used as an issue when applying for jobs. In fact, I know it cant, but beside the point, no, I dont expect to get any positive news back from my application somehow.

So, at this point, given it relates to this, I might as well slip the video in, here and now!

Well, looks like the last trip out as Ms Nicholls will now be happening tomorrow, for the medical screening, as I’ve heard nothing more about the job assessment on Wednesday, so… Yes, the next time I apply for any roles, or need to show ID, it will at long last be as Miss Carpenter! Can’t wait! And at some point next year, the first flight as Harlean is going to be something special. Mind, I probably need to get a job, and some money together for that!

Talking of money, if anyone has £75 ($113.52 at time of posting) to spare, I love this corset.

http://www.theburgandyboudoir.com/Purple-Gothic-Corset_p_816.html

Yes, I know, its a thoroughly submissive look, but I love it all the same. And hey, I switch, and could probably quite happily full time sub if I got to wear that. Oh fine, technicality, I also need someone to tie me (tightly) into it, but thats beside the point!

I know, I love gorgeous corsets, what can I say? 😉

Tie me up, and a few other things

Seriously, if there is anyone out there who thinks I’ve had a thoroughly innocent past, you’re going to be disappointed. Fine, I’m not as kinky as some, but yes, I’ve done bondage, and electro play in the (distant) past, though sadly I’ve never got to do a robotisation role play as yet, but there’s still time. I’ve played with the pro’s, I’ve played in private, I’ve played in clubs, so…Not that my halo should slip too far in your imagination, given the mind control stuff I’ve written in the past, but anyway…Oh, and fine, I’ve been friends with a couple of massage parlour workers, and I dont mean the ones who work wonders on my back, either! No, I couldnt do their job, but because of the kinky stuff… 😉

Kind of ironic then, that my interest in actual sex is pretty much zero. I mean, I’ve never had much of a sex drive ever in my life, but this century, well, I just havent bothered full stop. Literally, the 15th anniversary of the last time is only 4 months away! Alright, a little personal attention, every week or two, but otherwise, absolutely nothing! And no, I dont miss it.

Equally, as I’ve mentioned in the past, my Twitter feed is a pretty eclectic mix. Everything from old movies, vintage clothing and stuff, right through to scientific stuff. Oh, and writing stuff of course, what I originally planned to use it for. Well, anyway, one of my ‘friends’ there not only does vintage stuff, she’s also into burlesque! Up to now, my only experience of Burlesque was at that amazing party in Hollywood, in April, and yes, it was entertaining. No, I couldnt do it now. Maybe when I was in my twenties, just maybe, but in my fifties, you have to be joking!

Anyway, one of her contacts on Twitter is one of the queens of burlesque, and made a posting about how liberating strip tease could be. So fine, you know me, I made a witty comment about it not being a career option for a 50 something, and it went’downhill’ from there! No, not literally, but it did get to the point where they were trying to convince me that donning tassels, and shaking my body, at my age, was still a viable option! Next thing I know, a couple of others have joined in, and I’m being told about an event happening in Manchester next month, this

Home

No, thankfully, or otherwise, I’m not yet stripping, or doing burlesque at this show, though I know one or two who might say why not? Well, the fact I’m 57, not overly pretty, and have a body in less than perfect condition, but otherwise, oh fine!

I’ll be honest with you, if I was younger and earning, going to something like this might be a lot of fun. No, not to join the burlesque show, but seeing some of the corsetry, and fine, the latex clothing might just be a lot of fun. Not that I’d buy latex clothing at my age, and however much I love corsets (and I do), having no one to tie me into one makes it a daft buy, as my physical limitations would make it impossible for me to tie myself into one. Besides which, I’m lousy at knots anyway! And yes, I dont deny the chance to meet some of the people who do these things would be interesting.

As some who delve the site might have noticed, there’s even a BDSM/Bondage room in the evening. Now, if I say the last time I did any bondage would be about 10 years ago…yes, been a while, but it used to be fun. The only thing I never got was the spanking/caning/whipping stuff, which I never enjoyed, far too painful for me. I know, getting zapped by nice amounts of electrics can be painful, but thats a different ball game for me!

So now I can hear you asking, will I be going? Lets just say I’ll think about it, more so if I’ve got a job by then, and not working that Saturday. It would be fun, even if I’m not likely to get tied up, and ‘fried’ during the day, and the evening do would be inconvenient, both in terms of cost, and getting home afterwards! But fine, I’m tempted to go over during the day, despite the cost, and the fact I cant afford to buy anything, but it would be nice.

Right, the video. One of those random You Tube searches under ‘Tie Me Up’ led me to this.

The tale of the last few days, good news, and bad

So fine, lets at least start on a positive note, I could do with one at present. At least I think its positive, until the prize arrives at least!

A couple of weeks ago, I saw notice of a competition being run on Twitter, by a company called Fabulous Times. You had to select your favourite vintage pin up, and I tried a change of fortune, by selecting Jayne Mansfield. Yes, she’s blonde, and has a fine pair of, err, eyes. Well, something else really, but anyway…

Yesterday I had an email telling me that I’d won the competition, an absolute first. Given that the company that the voucher was for, is called Corset Story, it gives away their most popular sales item, I guess? And yes, even with a £50 voucher limit, there were some gorgeous ones there, that would restrict my waist quite tightly, if only I could lace them up behind my back! No, unlike Jean, I dont have a maid to tighten it up for me, I wish! And no, due to the limited flexibility in my wrist joints, there is no way (unlike the lady in the video tonight) that I could lace myself up.

So I resigned myself to buying a very nice dress instead, and leaving it at that. But…I asked if there were any that required very little, or no actual lacing while wearing it, and lo and behold…

http://www.corsets-uk.com/vintage-straight-line-overbust-with-angled-panels-and-piping-detail.html

Yes, I know, 1-2″ is not the same as pulling my waist in about 4″, but its better than nothing! And I should be able to put it on myself. 🙂 I do (somewhere, no idea where it is though) actually own a corset that would reduce me by about 4″ or so that is designed so I can lace it up from the front, but…as I say, its somewhere in my room, with the emphasis on the word somewhere, so this is more likely to get used.

Of course, if someone wants to act as my maid, and lace me up tightly, I could do a major search in my room to find it, but…No, thought not! If you need a clue how its done…

Right, fine, the less cheery news. Today, I can honestly say I did a phone interview, and it wasnt good. Alright, it was worse than that, as I had a total brain freeze when a question I hadnt planned for came up, and that was that! It was going OK until then, but that blew it, and I knew it. Yes, 5 minutes later, unsurprisingly I got the email telling me just that!

Also, someone rang here re an interview yesterday, while I was at the agency in Leeds, and hasnt rang back yet. Plus, I had an email last night from another agency, asking me to ring them re another job I’d made the short list for. I rang this morning, she was busy, no call back. Rang again this afternoon, yes, she had the message that I rang, but she still hasnt called back, aargh! If they try tomorrow, well…

Oh, and the hypnotherapy course that I thought I did so well at, at the weekend, been told they dont want me to continue. Alright, I do wonder if there is an element of ‘politics’ in this decision, given a friend of mine, and her relations with the guy behind the course, but anyway…Yes, very annoyed, though I do have another option if I decide to go forward with it anyway, so…

Tomorrow, I get to actually go to an interview in Wakefield. Yes, there will be competency questions (I know, but at least I have in theory been fed what they will ask), but there will also be a brief display to do, should be fun! After that, to the Job Centre, and sign on, a bit late, but they know I will be, so all fine.

Yes, its getting to me, I need that lucky break. No, I’m not yet planning on standing on the street corner, in a short skirt, but…rolls eyes!

Wish me luck, I need it. Well, other than for winning competitions to give me an hourglass look, at least!

Changing the female form

No, I’m not talking about the fictional (well, I assume it is) process of turning a girl into a bimbo, with inflated boobs, and deflated intelligence. I’m talking about something practical, which definitely changes the female form, tends to push the cleavage upwards and outwards, but as far as I know, has no effect on intelligence levels. Well, not unless it stops the blood getting through to the brain, and then all bets are off, lol! Yes, the corset, thats what I’m talking about here lol. What else did you think I was talking about, a silver robot suit maybe?

Over at the MC Garden, we have a section dedicate to picture threads, one of the more recent ones is one dedicated to the wearing of corsets, by ladies I might add, though I know some men wear them too. And yes, this blog arose because of a few recent posts on said thread.

Before I go further, let me say that some women, for reasons best known to themselves, take this matter far too far! Corseted 18″ waists arent natural, they arent comfortable, and must surely do some internal damage to the organs. No, I’m talking about using it to take a more sensible number of inches off the waist, for enhancement of the figure, either for looks, or to appeal to men. Me, I own one corset, though I havent worn it in quite a while, far too much hassle trying to tie yourself up in one, believe me, especially around the back, when your joints are less than flexible. It was designed to aid with my solo lifestyle, but even so…plus I rarely have time to do much with it, my life tends to be too busy, and chaotic to worry about putting a corset on, under everything else.

I’ll be honest, the reason I got one in the first place was a cosmetic one, to cut a more feminine figure.  Yes, my waist isnt as ‘slim’ as it should be for my figure, as those who have seen the pictures would know. So yes, a ‘squeeze’ from a corset gives me just that little bit more of an hourglass figure, or did when I used to wear it lol! No idea why, it wasnt like I was trying to attract men after all, but anyway…The thing that surprised me was that it wasnt that uncomfortable being squashed in, well not for the few inches I was trying for, anyway. Mind, I was never wearing it all day or anything lol! Whether I’d feel the same way now, after all this time is another matter, of course?

Now I’ve got someone wanting me to take it to the US with me, where Kate can tighten it up for me. Hmm, snag is, for wearing it out, it might end up being a long day lol! And its not exactly something you can remove in moments lol! And is it worth it, its not like I will be wearing figure hugging dresses over there, where it might be a benefit, but most likely tops and trousers? I’ll go by popular vote lol! 😛

Anyway, the video, a tribute to that figure enhancer, the corset.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RrXT0YDeGJA