Tie me up, and a few other things

Seriously, if there is anyone out there who thinks I’ve had a thoroughly innocent past, you’re going to be disappointed. Fine, I’m not as kinky as some, but yes, I’ve done bondage, and electro play in the (distant) past, though sadly I’ve never got to do a robotisation role play as yet, but there’s still time. I’ve played with the pro’s, I’ve played in private, I’ve played in clubs, so…Not that my halo should slip too far in your imagination, given the mind control stuff I’ve written in the past, but anyway…Oh, and fine, I’ve been friends with a couple of massage parlour workers, and I dont mean the ones who work wonders on my back, either! No, I couldnt do their job, but because of the kinky stuff… 😉

Kind of ironic then, that my interest in actual sex is pretty much zero. I mean, I’ve never had much of a sex drive ever in my life, but this century, well, I just havent bothered full stop. Literally, the 15th anniversary of the last time is only 4 months away! Alright, a little personal attention, every week or two, but otherwise, absolutely nothing! And no, I dont miss it.

Equally, as I’ve mentioned in the past, my Twitter feed is a pretty eclectic mix. Everything from old movies, vintage clothing and stuff, right through to scientific stuff. Oh, and writing stuff of course, what I originally planned to use it for. Well, anyway, one of my ‘friends’ there not only does vintage stuff, she’s also into burlesque! Up to now, my only experience of Burlesque was at that amazing party in Hollywood, in April, and yes, it was entertaining. No, I couldnt do it now. Maybe when I was in my twenties, just maybe, but in my fifties, you have to be joking!

Anyway, one of her contacts on Twitter is one of the queens of burlesque, and made a posting about how liberating strip tease could be. So fine, you know me, I made a witty comment about it not being a career option for a 50 something, and it went’downhill’ from there! No, not literally, but it did get to the point where they were trying to convince me that donning tassels, and shaking my body, at my age, was still a viable option! Next thing I know, a couple of others have joined in, and I’m being told about an event happening in Manchester next month, this


No, thankfully, or otherwise, I’m not yet stripping, or doing burlesque at this show, though I know one or two who might say why not? Well, the fact I’m 57, not overly pretty, and have a body in less than perfect condition, but otherwise, oh fine!

I’ll be honest with you, if I was younger and earning, going to something like this might be a lot of fun. No, not to join the burlesque show, but seeing some of the corsetry, and fine, the latex clothing might just be a lot of fun. Not that I’d buy latex clothing at my age, and however much I love corsets (and I do), having no one to tie me into one makes it a daft buy, as my physical limitations would make it impossible for me to tie myself into one. Besides which, I’m lousy at knots anyway! And yes, I dont deny the chance to meet some of the people who do these things would be interesting.

As some who delve the site might have noticed, there’s even a BDSM/Bondage room in the evening. Now, if I say the last time I did any bondage would be about 10 years ago…yes, been a while, but it used to be fun. The only thing I never got was the spanking/caning/whipping stuff, which I never enjoyed, far too painful for me. I know, getting zapped by nice amounts of electrics can be painful, but thats a different ball game for me!

So now I can hear you asking, will I be going? Lets just say I’ll think about it, more so if I’ve got a job by then, and not working that Saturday. It would be fun, even if I’m not likely to get tied up, and ‘fried’ during the day, and the evening do would be inconvenient, both in terms of cost, and getting home afterwards! But fine, I’m tempted to go over during the day, despite the cost, and the fact I cant afford to buy anything, but it would be nice.

Right, the video. One of those random You Tube searches under ‘Tie Me Up’ led me to this.

Too good to be true?

Sadly, on this occasion, the job offer I got on Saturday was just that.

The only thing standard about it, was the application button I hit. Most job adverts I’ve seen are full of details about the firm, what they do, and loaded with comments about excellent customer service, and all that. And yes, I can easily spot the sales one, and avoid them (I really am not the pushy kind) accordingly…normally. As for anything that even vaguely hints at cold calling, I avoid like the plague! The thing is, this one on Saturday morning really didnt tell me a lot. Telephone operator, and that pretty much was it. I have to say the wages sounded good, almost too good to be true? Anyway, as it wasnt screaming sales, I went for it, and applied.

Now, remember this is Saturday, most HR departments are firmly shut, even if call centres are open, so it came as a shock to me, when halfway through the afternoon, I got an email from these people, asking me if I was free to start training on Monday! Now remember, the only contact between us prior to then was my application. No phone call, no interview, no nothing! To say that this still told me virtually nothing about the role would be to put it mildly. So, I tentatively said I could do that, but asked for more details about the role. About 8.00 I got an email back, telling me it would be making appointments for the engineers, and that I would learn everything else on Monday.

So, I rolled my eyes, thought “why not?” and went for it. I quickly called off a couple of appointments today, but hedging my bets by doing it in such a way that I wasnt saying no to the opportunity, just delaying it. Wise move, as it proved.

So, its a call centre, I’m expecting at least decent phone systems, a decent computer, and a decent place to work. Ah well, got none of those! The phones were battered, and not new. No computers in sight, just bits of card to write down details on. And no requests for proof of identity, I thought that was illegal now? Next thing I know, I’m told its outbound sales calls, and when handed lists of names and numbers, its clearly cold calling. Yes, to try and sell solar panels. To be fair to the general public, not one appointment was made in the 35 minutes or so I was there!

Oh, the training. One woman sat on the opposite side of the desk to us, just hammering through her calls, and we just listened to her work, nothing else! To say her language was ripe, when people just put the phone down on her would be to put it mildly. As I say, after about 35 minutes, I excused myself, and left. Thankfully, with the shrewd use of emails, and phone calls, I’ve managed to rescue the other 2 roles. Well, of sorts, as one was a registration for an assessment centre tomorrow, which now wont happen. But if they dont get enough good candidates tomorrow, then I might get a chance yet. Otherwise, I’m registering with them, as they tell me there will be more similar roles soon. A couple more positive calls, so not a totally wasted day.

Right, to the video, or tonight, as a special treat, videos. Firstly the one about the job that never was

Secondly, and for some now, its hard to believe this was the norm, just 40 years ago. Now, same sex marriages are the norm, let alone gay relationships that have to be hidden away

Too much knowledge?

Every so often I read a story on the Archive, where I think the author has way too much knowledge for their story to just be a random piece of fiction. Today I read one of them, this one

Yes, fine, this pushes every hot button I’ve got, but, does the author know a little too well how all this works? 😉 I mean, knowing that a syringe, inserted into the rectum leaves no mark, and as for the drugs knowledge… Oh, and the tech stuff used on “lucky” Peggy, in this, oh goodness gracious, thats quite something! And yes, any time Tracey wants to come after me, she can feel free to do so! Indeed, I wish she would!

But why do I get the feeling that our author knows a little bit more about how this would work than most might feel comfortable with? Yes, I’d love it done to me, and she wouldnt even have to do an elaborate kidnapping, I’d go willingly!

And this is only her first story, oh wow! Any way, if I need a good fantasy to relieve a few tensions, just saying…Tracey, come and get me, please!

The video. Well I thought of this one, given what a drugs expert Tracey is. Can be said though, her drugs definitely work! And the brainwashing stuff, and the internal stuff, and…swoon!

Hang on, interview booked already?

To be honest, this job hunting game can be highly frustrating at times. You apply for jobs you’re perfectly qualified for, and hear nothing. So fine, I suspect, even though officially they shouldnt be doing so, my age sometimes comes into play, and thats why I hear nothing back.

There are also more than a few agencies that dont realise they are meant to get back to you in the first place. I’ve been messed about by so many, from all levels from a total waste of time and effort (including the ones behind that 1 week course I had to do, none of the agencies involved would get more than a 1 out of 10 for, and be lucky to get that, to those that I suspect just want to get their number count up, by registering you, and no more. Others will contact you, but I’ve known a couple who have taken over a month to do so, by which time I’ve assumed nothing will happen. Given that one of those was the “assessment from hell”, I might have been better off if they hadnt!

So, on Monday morning, about 8.30, when I sent off an application for another Customer Services Advisor job, I did it with little expectation of results. In fact within an hour, not only had I had a reply, and sent back an email, an interview was booked for Tuesday afternoon! Wow!

Alright, the interview didnt go totally according to plan. I did the form filling, a literacy test, and a group roleplay thing, just fine. There should then have been a typing test, and a 1 to 1 interview, but seemingly the room for the test had been double booked. So now I’m waiting to hear when I’m going back in! Ah well…its not the same agency that moves mountains in under an hour, so we will see!

Seriously, the speed it was going, I was expecting to be the ‘office robot’ by today, a personal cheeky comment about the nature of call centres, nothing more, I really should be that lucky to be offered the chrome robot suit to put on, and be integrated into lol! Oh please do, if possible!

Well, this part of the week has livened up, I’m glad to say that now, for the first time in a while, I’ve got a full set of gel nails again. Friday, is my ‘favourite’ day, signing on day at the Job Centre. I’m also getting a massage, and facial, the body really needs both. The former because my knees are objecting to the amount of heeled shoes I’ve been wearing, and my face, just because it needs it! Oh, and in theory, an interview in Leeds! Fingers crossed. Now, if that job really was for a position as office robot, I’d be begging them for the position!

Alright, the musical entertainment relates to the office robot comment, a song from when I was a child

A writing retreat

As many of my blog readers will know, I write stories, and have done for about 15 years now. All the early stuff, plus a few more recent ones can be found here

Warning, some of the early stuff isnt all that great, unsurprisingly my writing skills have developed over the years. As have my tastes. Most of my recent stuff, the mind control level is either so minimal to be negligible, or not even there at all. And to be honest, nowadays I write far less sci fi, and far more stuff written in the 1920’s or 30’s. Though occasionally, as with my latest piece, which I finished today, I have been known to connect both.

In this case though, the story is actually set in the current day (or strictly, about a year from now), as a follow up to my latest piece, “A Hollywood Happening”, which you can find here,


Though strictly, the modern day actress who stars at the end of this, and entirely in the new story, is loosely based on a 1920’s and 30’s bit part actress, who I discovered under hypnotic regression, was me, in a previous life! But of course, the modern day Clara Johnson is just a personal view on how her life would be today. I suspect this piece will appear on that Archive you see at the top in good time, though it may go out as an ebook as well.

But enough of that, though it sets up this blog, its not the main reason for it.

On Twitter (I’m lurking there as @harleanlook, if you want to link), one of the groups I follow is a writing retreat, somewhere near Seattle, called Hedgebrook. And every year seemingly, they invite female writers to apply for a stay at their delightful retreat on Whidbey Island, and write in seclusion. You can also enjoy the scenery, good company, and everything else, sounds amazing. And from what I’ve seen, and read, some amazing writers have spent time there, and loved it. The link to their site


Yes, a humble writer like me would love to do something like that, but me, beat off the competition, cant see it. But a bit like a delightful man at Loughborough University, for some reason, they think I should apply, and give it a go. Why not, you say, its not like I’m working at present or anything, after all? Well, actually that was part of my reason for not considering applying, there’s a fee involved with application, and I really ought to be preserving my funds. Oh fine, shot down, someone like me, the fee would be waived.

So now, what the hell, I’m going to go for it, though with no great expectations of winning. But yes, it would be an amazing place to go, if I won, I must say, so fingers crossed. Thing is, this wouldnt be a short, so I guess I’m either going to write the Jean Harlow biography I’m told I should do, turn “No Place Like Nome” into the full length story I’m told it should be, or do a crazy piece of sci fi, probably involving robots, and transformation! Realistically, it has to be the “Nome” story, I have been looking for a reason for years to develop that, and I should do that. But… Maybe I need to be hypnotically regressed, and write the unique Clara Johnson (auto)biography, though I can see much of a market for that!

The video. Its about writing songs, not novels, but its close enough!

Follow up to latest book?

Lets see how good the memories of some of my readers is, and more importantly, the state of their wallet! Recently, I posted my first new book for a while, giving it a try on Amazon unlimited, to see if that improved sales, though the effect seems to have been minimal.


Feel free to give it a try, us poor out of work authors need all the love we can get. if you prefer Barnes and Noble, or Smashwords, it will be on sale in those places from September, but anyway…Better still, go have a look here


Donate anything over £5, let me know an email address, and I’ll send you a free copy, with grateful thanks. Hows that? I’ll even attach a photograph of the cover as well.

Anyway, at the end of that story, our heroine makes a big decision, and sets out on her new life, as…? Well now, I’m writing a new piece, taking her life on a year or so, and though it will stand up on its own (I think?), it might be better if you know the first story, so…

Someone gets to spice up her life, indirectly, though secretly, its fair to say she’ll enjoy every moment of it… maybe? Especially as I’m pretty sure she’ll be restored to her natural self before the story is over. Oh yes, and fine, its fun for me, as its fair to say that she is very special to me, in a past life sort of way.

Its something I’m writing for a challenge at the Garden, but I’m pretty sure that in time, it will get exposed to a wider audience. Given she is definitely going to get mind controlled at some point, it might even hit the Archive at some point, or I might just sell it, and see.

At least I’m (finally) getting something positive done while not working! Mind, I’d rather be working, but anyway…

OK, the video. I guess its the fact this is mainly filmed in black and white that makes me think of vintage movies. Plus what the two ‘actors’ look like. Besides that, its a much under rated song

Just connect my brain to your computer system, preferred option!

I never thought I’d say it of a job interview process that it would be more pleasant, and far less time consuming to simply have my mind wired into a computer system (including electrode fitting time/invasive surgery, I might add) than go through a formal assessment for a job interview, but I can now! Hey, if it was for MI6, then I could understand caution, but for a call centre role…rolls eyes! And yes, I can comment accordingly, I already know I havent got the job, so…Hardly surprising, with what I went through, by the time I got to the formal interview, they’d worn me down totally!

It started off fine, with the guided tour of all the floors in the building that the company worked in. Ironically, the last one we were shown was the one where, if we got the job, was where we’d be working, but anyway… After that, we did a group exercise, what we didnt know until afterwards was that at least 2 other members (of the 7) had instructions directly in conflict with our own. So in 20 minutes, nothing practical got done, and we were all frazzled by the battle we’d been put through.

After that, the role play. What I’m discovering with these is that you are meant to know details way beyond the basic for these things, without providing us with any details. So you fight your way through, not knowing more than the very basic details you need to play with, its hard work. Fine, I still had more details than 1 potential employer wanted to provide me with, but anyway… It was at this point that 1 of our group decided she’d had enough, told her inquisitor that she was taking a minute out, and then told us she was walking out, she’d had enough! Seemingly I wasnt the only one who could see things her way, either. Anyway, the other 6 of us stuck it out.

To say the ‘two on one’ interview afterwards was a psychological battle, would be to put it mildly. Normally you feel that the interviewers at least want you to do well, but this time around, it felt like they were trying to catch you out. So by the time (this is after about 3.5 hours) they got to the competency questions, I was so beaten up, that I didnt give great answers, totally worn down.

In the email, it was suggested I could apply again in the future for roles, but I dont think I could face that again, knowing what would happen at the test!

Yes, fine, I would enjoy having my mind wired up to a machine, and having my thoughts tapped to deal with all their questions, and tests. Hey, even if it involved invasive wiring of my mind to do it, instead of having that again, I’d happily take it! At least I’d enjoy the whole experience far more that way! How anyone gets through that process sane, I have no idea! All for call centre work. I’d hate to apply for the CEO job at that place, in that case!

Yes, the only way they will ever get me back again, IS if they off to connect my mind to a helmet/machine, and tap my thoughts for the answers they are seeking. Job or no, I’d love that process at least. More than can be said for, that.

Fine, the video. One of my all time faves. Always In My Mind might be more apt, but anyway, close enough

Dont think too much. May not be an option!

Its funny, one of the things they say about job interviews, is to be yourself, and not over think your answers. I mean, clearly for these ‘annoying’ competency based questions, you have to do so, to some degree, but otherwise…be yourself, let the people interviewing you, get to know you.

So fine, when I got the email confirming my attendance for the assessment tomorrow afternoon, it amused me that it came from an address simply called, ‘System Integration’, and telling me that I had to report to them tomorrow. Had me wondering for a few glorious minutes if I’d found a job as part of the Borg project! Sadly, about 5 minutes later I got another email requesting me to report to reception instead, what a let down!

Yes, I know, I’m probably the only person who would enjoy being integrated into a computer system for the assessment period, but even so…I can still hope for tomorrow, but suspect now I’m going to be disappointed on that front at least. Mind, given there is a group exercise, that might truly have been a Borg moment lol!

Of course, at some point in the future, I suspect interview techniques will change, and I suspect that questioning might be done in a way that companies get true answers, instead of whatever story you tell them. Oh, I wish! Especially as the computer could then simply search for the answer to the competency situations that they like to ask you about. Mind, at that point, could they simply ‘refocus’ your mind, to make you the perfect, and very faithful candidate anyway? 😉

But tomorrow, for me to be integrated into the computer system at that workplace, sadly, probably not. But until tomorrow afternoon, a girl can dream at least.

Right, the video. What I suspect you wouldnt be able to do for yourself, after system integration…with any luck!

The Hive Mind scenario

You know how you read in fiction stories about the hive mind, where many people all think the same controlled thoughts? Or indeed, for those who love their Star Trek, you have the beloved Borg, who like to assimilate people to all think just as they do? Well yes, up to now, its pure fiction, but we may be taking the first steps towards making it a reality!

Mind, of course, at the moment the Mind Meld being planned is more to see if many minds can work together, to see if they can get things done, but how long before its the minds being controlled? Or those powerful linked minds, controlling the minds of others? Not going to happen, well read this!


Agreed, this is at a very basic stage, and has only been tested on animals so far, but give it time…human tests must happen at some point! And yes, you’re right, I’d love to be part of that. And yes, is it so far fetched that in the future, a group of powerful minds might just be used to control the thoughts of others?

Mind, once you’re part of the all encompassing mind, will you know, or care?

OK, the other amusing piece of mind controlling amusement I had today, was in an email. I’ve got an assessment thing on Tuesday for a job, and I got an email from ‘System Integration’ telling me I had to report to them on arrival! Could I really be that lucky, getting my mind integrated into their system? Oh please, but I’m sure that sadly, its not going to happen. But a girl can dream.

Right the video. I remember this song still, though it must be nearly 50 years ago that I heard it for the first time, if not more. Amazingly, for a song that old, I found a live show performance

OK, lastly, 2 more things. On Thursday night, I went to a charity fashion show, and the wonderful photographer took a picture of me, after my hair had been styled, and here it is

Me in lacy dress

And very lastly, and I promise, the last request until just before it closes, the fund raiser to help me pay for my name change. Just imagine being able to read the blogs of Stephanie Harlean Carpenter, and give, however small.


Not a model, but hopefully looking good

OK, before we get to the bit in the title, lets do the begging bit!

So fine, I have decided (in a moment of craziness) to actually launch a fund raising campaign, to at least partly (and hopefully more) pay for the costs of formally changing my name to Miss Stephanie Harlean Carpenter. Has a nice ring to it, doesnt it? Works all ways around, as those who know me as Steph can still call me that, but I can also legitimately use the name Harlean, as and when I want to. Lets face it, how many people use their middle name anyway? 😉

No, this campaign doesnt involve donating large sums of money, at a quick costing (allowing for fees, and things), £120 should be enough, though if it goes slightly over, it would be good. Fine, I know it wont, but no harm in hoping. Indeed, anything beyond what one wonderful friend has already donated would be quite something!

Fine, the link https://fundrazr.com/campaigns/e10ypc/ab/c2hJdb Even a couple of pounds will help, so please be kind, though more would be wonderful. But given that most reading this only know me through the blog, ah well…

Right, begging over, well in terms of giving to me at least.

Tomorrow night, I’m off to a fashion show. Its for a charitable cause in Leeds to sort of launch the studio for the people who I had my 2 photo shoot sessions with. Why sort of? Because its to launch the new studio, even if it has been operational for a while, this is the formal launch. No, I’m not modelling, just part of the audience, but it should be fun. The link, even though I know most readers of this arent local to me, is https://www.facebook.com/events/1608781949397731/ (apologies if you dont have Facebook, but its the only link I can find). Please check tickets remain before just turning up, just saying…

Yes, I will be there, using my old name, though if anyone calls me Harlean, I probably wont blink!

Lastly, the video. This is a Kraftwerk song, but this is definitely not their version! It is in German, but I’m sure you can cope, I prefer it that way anyway.